I’m sure it has taken time for some parents to come to a mutual understanding that it’s all about the child/children. They are the ones that can sit with each other at the sport games, school concert or can tag funny kid memes on Facebook and get along just fine.
Then there is us. Now quick side note – I just cleaned up puke for the last hour and a half, then called her dad (yes, out of frustration) to double-check that she had her allergy medicine and doesn’t have anything around her that will make her sick. The part regarding that she may or may not be around a cat that she is allergic to is still being investigated.
Here’s why for me, it sucks:
We both are controlling.
I don’t get to tuck her in bed every night like I use to – for 8 years.
When she compares how many TV’s he has compared to our one.
When their “quality time” it playing video games.
When I have to worry that she is around something she is allergic to.
When I take her on vacations and, still, all I hear about is that her dad has a new dog, new watch, new Alexa, new etc.
When she is sick and I can’t be there.
When after 41 weeks and 14 hours of labor, I have to split her birthday.
When Christmas morning comes, and she isn’t with me.
When and IF he walks into my home, he judges cleanliness – it still needs to be to his standard.
When you’re trying to be mature – but want to throat punch the other parent.
And it really sucks when are compared to the other parent and people don’t know the whole situation. It’s easy to fake a great life on social media, when you’re not actually living one.
I want to take her on vacations to see different places (she recently asked me to take her to New York when she’s older!) I put her in activities because she is a social butterfly. But when you’re constantly undermined by the other parent, frustration comes out and usually at the wrong person.
After years of frustration, it become infuriating.
I wish tonight I can say, “Here’s how to handle this in 5 different ways,” but honestly, I don’t know.
I do know that I can’t let her see my anger, frustration and bitterness. It’s not fair to her and it will impact my relationship with her. My relationship with her is important to me. How she handles frustrating situations is based on how she see’s me handle them.
So tonight, I say good night and good luck.