For the last two months, I have been texting a decent guy. He hasn’t given me any red flags. We’ve talked on the phone. Sent appropriate picture to confirm we aren’t catfishing (using a false identity) each other. But, we still haven’t met.
Don’t ask me why, because I don’t know why. Yes, busy schedules are an issue, but there’s no excuse for not putting a bit more effort into someone you’re interested in.
How did we meet? We met through a dating app. I swiped right, and we matched. Well, we liked each other’s profile. But guess what? I matched with 4 other guys also at the same time. That’s the thing. In the world of dating, I can talk to almost anyone at the hand of a swipe.
Now, when I was in college (think, 2002-2006) we met guys at college games, classes, college bars, or parties. Then after college, we still had more established bars, mutual friends, and work. But now, people are available at a swipe. And if I’m on a date that isn’t going well, I can message another guy I’ve been chatting to, and meet up with him instead.
Or better yet, he can met up with her after our date.
I don’t know if I’m the only woman he’s talking to. Trust me, I’ve been in the situation where I wasn’t the only one. I was available every other weekend, and on the opposite weekends, there was someone else. (Since he’ll never read this, that really hurt me.)
Dating apps are a shear fire way of reminding me that I’m not a childless 26 year old. That I’m a 33 year old mother. I’m at trade in age.
Like I said, dating apps make it easy to met someone at any given moment. Hence, Mr. Right Now.
But is it a way to met Mr. Right?
I have been on more first dates than I can count. I can text someone so much before meeting them, that I lose the excitement of the first date jitters. I’m not charming through texts and probably come off as too sarcastic. I will do my research on someone through social media to see if there is anything I should ask about or see if we have anything in common without asking him first.
It was suggested once that if I was serious about finding someone than a dating app is the worst place. That I need to look into a singles group or Church group. Meet someone in person. First off, I attend a Catholic Church, with all the standing and kneeling, we don’t have that kind of time. Also, is there even single groups anymore? Or is that just a chat room? Are those even around anymore?
I will not be an option. I will not be #2. I waited this long, I won’t settle.
Well, that’s where I’m at. I’m trying. Not as hard as I could be (I still have a small person to raise,) but I am trying.